hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
