Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Randomize