You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Where is the baby squirrel I found last night?! I've looked all morning I can't find Morris anywhere did someone take him?? ðŸ˜ðŸ˜
Honey, I kept trying to tell you it was just a pine cone.
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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