I must be too annoying 4 u.
I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
If there's anything else you're planning on stealing from me, please let me know so I can set it on fire
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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