There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
Little spoons don't ask big questions
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
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