Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
My dermatologist just asked me, "what happened here?" referring to the bruising on my nipples. I told her I walked into a door. Thanks for that awkward moment.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Sometimes I love sober logical me. She makes rare appearances but when she does she shines.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I just watched my mom pour beer into her vodka and drink it.
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
Neighbor just came over and asked if I had anything to clean blood out of carpet... it's definitely time to move.
Randomize
