i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
7:26 bus just came. I am sweatier than Louie Anderson eating chili in a sauna
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
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