I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
You made out with two different species that night
I actually bought food at McDonald's as an apology for what I was about to do to their bathroom.
I just blew my weed a kiss
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I spent the whole ride asking the cabbie if people ever have sex back there, and if he wanted me to make that number one higher.
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
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