why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
being pregnant is like rehab
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Randomize
