Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
i had them turn on teen mom at the bar so i wouldnt be tempted to go home and make babies with the guy next to me
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
