as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
My ATM looks so different sober.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I need a costume
Dude just wear a bra or something hahaha
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
