margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
its liver damage thursday
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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