I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Call me old-fashioned, but I don't think the words, "Finger my ass" should find their way into casual conversation.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
Randomize
