Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
You did not just play the dead husband card again.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
she had a concussion and she still scored nine points higher than me on the midterm
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
