Can we switch to phone sex? This is starting to get awkward...
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
For some reason I just don't think you going to the gay bar alone on thanksgiving is a good idea.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.
Just grabbing my bra from a history teacher's desk in the Humanities building. Maybe I should stop drinking on weeknights
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
Randomize
