just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
you called me at 4 in the morning and invited me over for pasta and a late night viewing of titanic.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Can't trust a bar that doesn't have fireball
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
