Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I asked him to tell me a bedtime story, then threw up on him.
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize