so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
There is a wine bar at this airport that it is currently full of mid-40s women reading their Kindles. I'm attracted to all of them.
It's 11 A.M.
You know what, I think I will
OMG I accidentally abducted a cat. Now there is a cat in my apartment. I NEED TO UNDO WHAT I HAVE DONE
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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