Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
I love having hate sex.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
