im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
I woke up naked in her room. More precisely, I woke up naked in her room with her and her sister laughing at my penis. I hate my life.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
Randomize
