the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
