Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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