I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
We get up to three toppings. Dignity is not one of them.
Randomize
