just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
