is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
Keep your head up. His game is good, and you should be honoured to be a notch on his wall. If it makes you feel better, if it wasn't you, it was going to be me.
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
