And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
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