Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
Dude, sorry for live texting you my binge drinking. If you'd like me to do the same for my hangover, I can share that I just had to sit down while q-tipping my ears.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
That sad moment when the drawer I used to keep condoms in now has poptarts in it..
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
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