Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
Randomize