You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
I'm not saying Tijuana was a bad idea, I'm saying that we make poor life choices. And Steve was robbed by the police.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
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