OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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