I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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