Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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