Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
But please don't judge me if i smell like mustard
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
i just went to hell in the tanning bed. i think god is giving me a preview of what is in store if i keep getting drunk everyday.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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