I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Randomize
