Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Randomize
