your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
The Stanley Cup Final is killing me. I can't go to work drunk again.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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