take 3 tylenol pm's and try playing basketball.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
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