Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
