ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
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