I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
okay, but you can't tell anyone. Every time he instagrams something with the caption "avocado," it means he's booty calling me. Happy?
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
