i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
His search history includes homemade sex toys and a plunger. I'm scared about what goes on in their place.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
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