i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
he had more hair on his balls then in my Easter basket
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I don't deserve a penis
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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