Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
He wanted me to strip for him. I told him that we aren't at that serious of a fuck buddy relationship yet
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize