I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
after he handcuffed me and put me in the back seat, "Mrs. Officer" started playing, I thought maybe this could be my escape
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
He wrote me a Haiku titled, "Let me touch your butt".
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
The main motivators in my life are my sex drive and spite
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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