We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
why do i have 22 missed calls from someone who is literally saved in my phone as bumrape star??
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
We need to stop sleeping with people based on which NFL team they like.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
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