he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
i think i have herpe
just one?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
P.S. It's common courtesy to let the girl your banging know if she's about to walk into the same place your girlfriend is at so she can get her poker face ready
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
