Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Randomize
