just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
Randomize
