Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
What is more embarrassing, shitting yourself in Mexico or having sex in a forest preserve with a 19 yr old? This is crucial research.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Randomize