My room smells like vodka and shame
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
They won't let me buy alcohol in the airport until 9am. Super judgemental
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
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