You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Way to ruin everything
I am drinking jager with a cat, your argument is invalid
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
So just spent 30 minutes of my life talking to my cousins friend who told me she buys cocaine from a pizza place by asking for extra Parmesan
Randomize
